All too human
by smaragdbird
Summary: Lorne and Parrish were accidentally married to each other off world. This is only the beginning of their problems. Slash


Lorne eyed the fruit Parrish had handed him suspiciously. Not, you know, because said fruit looked wildly different from what you would find on Earth; it looked like a harmless little plum, but because of what had happened last time.

Parrish had caught Lorne's suspicious glance and rolled his eyes. Lorne in turn raised his eyebrows at him. To make his point Parrish bit into his own plum-like fruit.

"Here," Cadman rolled her eyes as well and grabbed Lorne's plum, giving him her own instead.

"Hey!" Lorne protested but Cadman had already bitten into the fruit. She gave him a pointed look.

"You're ridiculous, Evan." They sat far away from Parrish and Reed. Parrish had only given them the fruits because it was considered an honour and the local mayor had taken quite a shine to their botanist.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Lorne said bur stared over to Parrish and Reed who both seemed quite taken by something the handsome local mayor's son was telling them.

"When was the last time you talked to David?" Cadman asked pointedly.

"What are you talking about?" Lorne asked exasperated: "I talked with him this morning."

"I meant beside "Parrish you stay with Reed and ieverything/i you do gets run by me first."

"It's difficult."

"For God's sake, you were married to him, by eating a local fruit. It's not the end of the world. I mean even the Colonel barely raised an eyebrow at you. Get over it."

/

They didn't speak about Lorne's avoidance of Parrish again. Lorne knew that he was hurting Parrish but it was awkward for him. Marriage meant something to him and the situation was made even more complicated by the fact that he liked Parrish, liked him a lot. But combining Don't ask Don't tell with them being in the same team Lorne had preferred not to examine his feelings for Parrish too closely.

Until they had shared a fruit on Aulis after Parrish had assured him that despite its garish pink colour and star shape it was just a harmless fruit. Lorne also believed him that he hadn't known because of the similar look of shook on his face when the chief of Aulis had congratulated them to their union.

Still, they hadn't really talked afterwards. About anything. Whenever Parrish had tried to talk to him, Lorne had cut him off either by insisting that everything was okay or that he was busy.

/

"Ah, Major," Parrish called out to Lorne. He was accompanied by Reed and the mayor's son whose name had slipped Lorne's mind.

"Dr. Parrish, what can I do for you?" Lorne drawled, trying not to show that he resented how close they stood. Parrish liked to flirt with the locals both men and women. Sometimes it was more than flirting but Lorne had never acted on it. He hadn't let it get to him. Now they were married and suddenly it meant something even though the logical side of his brain knew that he still didn't have any right to be possessive.

"Lykaon wants to show me some of the local flowers." Parrish's tone made it clear that he found it ridiculous that he suddenly had to ask for Lorne's permission to go off with someone but did it for the team's integrity.

"In the middle of the night?" Lorne asked, trying not to wince when Cadman hit him discreetly in the ribs with her elbow, hard.

"This planet has a vast diversity of night flowers." Cadman's look told him that he shouldn't push this too far.

"Okay, have fun."

"Don't worry, Major Lorne," Lykaon grinned and slung an arm over Parrish's shoulders: "Abducting doesn't belong in our in courtship rituals. We place much emphasis on consent." He turned to Parish with a flirtatious smile which Parrish reciprocated.

"Have fun with your "flowers", Davey." Cadman laughed, pushing him lightly into Lykaon in the same moment Lorne said: "He's married anyway."

Everyone's expression sobered immediately and Lykaon unentangled himself from Parrish.

"Really?" He asked quite seriously. If looks could kill, Lorne would have dropped dead that very second.

"No." Parrish answered decidedly: "It's a running gag in our team that has a long story behind it. Maybe I'll tell you." He winked at Lykaon who relaxed visibly and followed Parrish. As soon as they were out of sight, Cadman hit Lorne quite hard against the upper arm with a furious look in her eyes while Reed said groaningly: "You're an idiot."

"I didn't mean to-" Lorne began but Reed cut him off:

"Yes you did. We're not blind. Laura and I have watched for four years how you stare longingly after Parrish each time he heads off with some local girl or guy. Honestly Evan do something about it or get over him but don't ruin his chances of becoming happy with someone else."

With that he walked away. Cadman was just as surprised at the outbreak as Lorne. Neither of them had though that the soft-spoken Reed was capable of this, but she recovered sooner than Lorne.

"What he said." She gestured in Reed's direction before she followed him.

/

Lorne was still sitting at the fire hours later. He couldn't sleep so he tried to sketch the buildings around him. When something in front of him blocked the light, he looked up.

"Hi, honey, I'm home. Did you wait up for me? How nice of you." Parrish's tone was pure acid. Lorne rose to his feet.

"I didn't think you would be back so soon." Lorne replied, ignoring Parrish's earlier words.

"Didn't you? After you ruined my night so thoroughly?" Parrish didn't get loud when he was angry; he got cold, very, very cold.

"It was meant as a joke." Lorne tried to defend himself. He knew that he had only meant half of it to be a joke but hoped that Parrish wouldn't read the guilt right off of his face.

"Keep your jokes to yourself next time." Parrish replied icily and left.

/

The flight home in the jumper the next day could only be described as uncomfortable. Parrish was very clearly still pissed at Lorne but hid it under a mask of perfect professionalism which was so unlike him that everyone found it unnerving.

Cadman was in the seat next to Lorne while Parrish sat at the back with Reed who helped him to categorize some of the plants Lykaon had shown Parrish the previous night.

"Hey, "Reed said when they were in space: "Can I fly to the gate? The Colonel says I need some practice."

"Sure," Lorne stood up to let Reed into the pilot seat but Cadman didn't move. She looked very pointedly from him to Parrish, then turned round to monitor Reed's flight.

Lorne suppressed a sigh and headed into the rear of the Jumper.

"Do you need help?" He asked Parrish, kneeling down next to the other man.

"I think after what happened on Aulis, you should give my work a wide berth." Parrish replied in a clipped tone. Lorne wondered if this was how Parrish had felt like every time he had brushed him off and was going to let it slip this time as well when suddenly the doors between them and the head of the Jumper closed.

Lorne jumped to his feet but Reed's voice came clear over the comsystem.

"Sorry for the drastic measure but Laura and I think you should talk."

"Open the door, now, that's an order." Lorne demanded but it was Parrish who answered: "They have probably switched off the comsystem so that you can't charge her with disobedience."

"I could charge them for mutiny." Lorne groused. Parrish shrugged and went back to his work.

"Why aren't you more annoyed with them?" Lorne asked him.

"It's not their fault. They don't know that you've made your feelings on the matter perfectly clear already." Parrish replied without looking at him.

"And what feeling would that be?"

"You practically ran every time I tried to talk to you about what happened on Aulis. Despite what McKay says I'm capable of putting the pieces of a puzzle together and I'm fine with it."

"You don't seem fine."

"You behaved like a jerk last night." Parrish still didn't look at him but Lorne could hear the anger in his voice:" If you don't want to talk about Aulis, then fine, but don't use my mistakes against me in that fashion. I can always transfer to another team if you think you can't keep your professionalism around me just because we're married on one planet in this galaxy. It's beneath you Evan."

Lorne sat down on the bench watching Parrish work. The silent stretched between them until Lorne said quietly: "Marriage matters where I come from."

"In that case we should ask the people of Aulis for a divorce. Wouldn't want to have you feel chained down by me." Parrish was quite capable of the same level of biting sarcasm that McKay was.

"That's not what I meant."

"What did you mean then?" Parrish finally turned around to face him: "Because I'm confused, first you won't talk to me for weeks but when we're off-world and someone shows interest in like the countless times that happened before, you suddenly become possessive." When Lorne avoided meeting Parrish's eyes, Parrish spat: "I thought so." And turned back around.

"I hated it every time you went off with someone." Lorne said after a while. Time had become irrational. He couldn't tell whether they were supposed to be at the gate already or not.

He observed that Parrish's hands stopped working and his whole body tensed: "I've watched you for six years and I hated it every single time. I guess accidentally getting married...I thought...I thought that something or someone was giving me a hint to get my act together. Well that and the repeal."

"You could have said something." Parrish said stiffly.

"I could have been thrown out." Lorne answered almost dryly.

"You could have said something." Parrish repeated: "Not in the first year, maybe not even in the second but it's been six years. We're a team. We're friends." The disbelief and hurt in Parrish's voice cut Lorne even more than the icy fury the night before: "I'm bisexual, did you really think I would rat you out to Sheppard or Caldwell or whoever might be interested enough in who you're sleeping with to throw you out?"

"I like you." Lorne confessed: "That was the main reason why I didn't tell you. I told myself that I was happy with how things were and that any relationship we might have would be based around lies and deception and sneaking around. I understand if you want to transfer after this. I'll take a new team so that you can stay with Reed and Cadman."

"Of course you would." Parrish didn't sound bitter but something very close to it: "If your next sentence is "We can still be friends" I will shoot you." He sounded absolutely serious and Lorne's heart sank. Of course Parrish wouldn't want to be friends anymore.

"I understand."

"Do you? Because I don't think you do." Parrish stood up and turned around: "Don't think that I'm not angry with you. I will be angry for a long time but no, I don't want to be friends with you. I want a bit more than that."

"You mean..."

"I think we should give it a shot. You, me, us." Parrish shrugged. Lorne felt a slow but radiant smile break out on his face: "That's great."

"Thought you would say that." He walked over to the door, banged against it: "Laura, open this bloody door or Evan and I will have sex here."

"TMI." Came Cadman's voice from the other side but the door slid open: "Atlantis this is Lieutenant Cadman, we're coming home."

"Understood, welcome back." Came Chuck's voice over the radio.

Lorne looked over to Parrish and allowed himself to think that everything would be fine before they entered the gate and were split into millions of atoms.

They were home.


End file.
